And the Triumph

Hey everybody! Didn't think you'd hear back from me so soon did ya, eh?? 

We just finished a time of worship and prayer and encouragement and giving as a school, and man! People have been so incredibly generous to me. I've been given to by my classmate's family members for goodness sake! God has been blessing me and affirming me so much today, and I am immensely thankful for that! It is easy to feel downtrodden and anxious as the pressure mounts with our deadline for finances just one day away. Yet God is not distressed, and He says do not be anxious about anything. Tonight He spoke, "I adore you my beautiful and obedient daughter! Are you ready for me to blow your mind? Grace I will not fail you! You are mine! Just trust me." 

I imagine that thought process a child goes through when she jumps off a ledge into the arms of a parent. She knows her Father is trustworthy, He is capable, He is ready and waiting. It is safe in His arms. But still as she leaps off that platform, for a moment she is caught in the rush of a free fall. The ground she stood on before is no longer firm beneath her soles. It's exhilarating and causes her stomach to do a flip. But she knows her Father will catch her. Because He promised. Because He's done it before. Because He loves her.

Throughout this entire week God has been portraying my journey (in regards to finances) through pictures like this. A father and his child. Indeed, a father could simply grant a child's request, no questions asked. Dad, can I have 20 bucks? Yes. Dad, can I spend the night somewhere? Yes. But what is loving? What is caring? I would say that it is more exciting, more growing, more beneficial for the two to work together. It is indeed a journey, and the parent wants to make the most of it for the child. He wants the child to grow and mature in understanding, for the child's heart to be right, and for the two of them to grow closer because of it. That is what this is, folks! God is stretching me immensely during this time and bringing healing into many corners of my heart.

It's been a bit of a bumpy road, as I have been trying to see what this all looks like for me, trying to press into Him deeper, trying to challenge myself to be more proactive and prayerful, trying to just be myself, trying not to try. I have let go of my instinctive need to perform many times. But is it any wonder? A daughter longs to please her father. Daddy, look! Daddy look at me, watch me run, watch me dance, watch me grow. She longs for the attention and the approval of her dad. Yet we serve a God who is unlike any other, who is far greater than we can comprehend. And He says: daughter, look! Look at this rainbow I painted to brighten your day. Look at the wonderful family of people I have created to be your support. See the way I am weaving every circumstance of your life together for your good? Daughter, see how I love you?

Time and time again, I try to do it all on my own. I take burdens onto myself that I was not meant to bear. I complicate the simple and oppose the good. But my Father knows me. I picture yet again a father and his child, and the way he knows how his daughter has habits that are disobedient to him. He told her not to try to balance on that tightrope because he knows that she will fall. But when she does, he simply rushes to her to comfort her and hold her close. He is not thinking of punishment, of why did you do this? how could you, yet again? He knows her. And my Father knows me. He sees the way I can get so "full" of, well, everything. He knows me. I see Him pick me up tenderly, squeeze me tight, and let it all seep out. He just wants me to come to Him, to let Him. He just wants me to look into His face and not at the obstacle before me. He wants me to come to Him as I am, to be real, and to let Him take care of me. 

And how well does He take care of me! He has been providing thousands upon thousands of dollars for me and my classmates. It may not be the how we expect, but He still makes a way. Our total outreach fees cost per person went down by about $900 as there was a change in our outreach schedule. We are no longer able to go to Ethiopia due to issues with our visas and being given permission by the hospital. This was a bit disappointing because we were all growing in anticipation for Ethiopia. But! We will instead be going to Hyderabad, India for 4 months and then to Calcutta for the last 2 months. We will still go to Zambia first, as scheduled, for 2 months. I can't wait!!

Our deadline for finances is September 11th. I have $5,900 AUD left to go. And I know He will do it. So come, let's do this together! Let's see the miraculous and mighty way that our Father provides.

Grace

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Okay I just want to update this! I forgot to mention that I saw $525 come in last week just from the walk-a-thon! I went for about 8km. Praise God!

So today is the 11th, and I wanted to let you know that a beloved friend and classmate has purchased all my plane tickets for me!! So that took off about $3,030! What a day. My new total need is $2,600. So close! Anything and everything helps my friends! Thank you so much for all you have been giving :). God wants to see these midwives sent out to the nations. Hallelujah. Bless you all and thank you for praying and partnering with me!

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Actually JUST KIDDING, an hour after I wrote this I went to the accountants office to pay in $480. I asked what my new total need was, and he said that as a matter of fact I was $560 OVER what I owed. So somehow in the span of today somebod[ies] paid in the rest of my fees!!!! HE DID IT!!!